How often do you ask yourself these questions about your customer care strategy?

* Do your customers feel important?

* Do your customers feel that you are interested in them and what they want and need?

* How do you show that you value them?

* Do you tell them what’s in it for them, how they will benefit from your products and/or service?

* Do you show empathy with their point of view?

* Do your customers feel special?

How good is your customer care? Customer care is about caring for your customers and also caring about them after all people don’t just buy the product or service they buy-into you and your business. In almost all sectors of business you face competition often quite intense competition so why do your customers chose you? The answer is that a customer buys a complete product that includes not only the item or service, but a number of emotional factors as well.

Customer care is a developed over time and all the members of your organisation need to be committed to the concept. You need to:

* Define your standards;

* Determine how you will measure performance;

* Train staff;

* Monitor and measure performance;

* Retrain as necessary; and

* Show that the organisation appreciates the effort made by the staff to meet customer expectations.

So what are you waiting for? Have you asked your customers how you can improve your performance, what standards they expect and whether internal company standards meet or exceed their requirements? Customer care is a team activity everyone in the business needs to get involved and sing from the same hymn sheet. Sam Walton is reputed to have said “There is only one boss. The customer. And he can fire everybody in the company from the chairman on down, simply by spending his money somewhere else.” Right on the nail, I feel!

http://thehumanimprint.typepad.com/the_human_imprint/2008/03/customer-care.html

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I spent some twenty years in the corporate world, for much of it I was not particularly interested in spirituality. It was a world where profits reigned supreme, often with little respect for the rest of society.

It took a while for change to happen in Australia, but led by Ralph Nader in the USA, consumers have become more aware of their rights with respect to corporations. New government bodies looking at pollution, corporate fraud and other matters have appeared and some of our leading businessmen are spending time behind bars. Greater education of the general population is leading to more informed choices by consumers.

There have been many cases of businesses ignoring those who have an interest in what they do at their own peril. At university my business degree has placed much emphasis on stakeholder theory and issues management.

These concepts refer to understanding the needs of the wider community including governments and pressure groups and the likely effect on business operations under differing conditions. Even the big Australian, BHP, has set up an issues management department after it was caught polluting the Fly river in Papua New Guinea.

Values which show a genuine concern for society as a whole, rather than individual gain tend to be spiritual in nature. When we understand that we are all part of the same spirit, including the earth and the air we breathe we start to take on a different attitude to life.

There is a universal law of cause and effect in operation which means that whatever we put out we get back. It is wise for us to be considerate in our business dealings or sooner or later we will suffer the consequences.

Take the case of a murderer. The consequences of murdering someone is that one spends the rest of their life in gaol. If I murder another and end up in prison I shouldnt really be surprised and say, Its not my fault. Clearly I created the situation by my actions.f you really wish to progress in the corporate world while feeling happy and good about yourself, then work in a corporation which is ethical. Join an organisation which looks at the good of the whole of society as well as its corporate profits. By working in an organisation which has similar values to those you hold personally, you will certainly rest easier at night.

With the current changes in awareness as more people read books such as this one and open up to their spiritual connection, those corporations which practise unethical behaviour will falter. In the next millennium you will increasingly see a more aware public change from unethical companies to those who align with their own values.

I have always operated with the philosophy that your staff are your greatest asset in business. I have worked with my staff to assist them in carrying out their activities.

Customer Service is another much talked about aspect of modern business. Basically your customers pay your wages, so being nice to them ensures that you are paid. Maybe it is all right to be genuinely nice to the boss. Perhaps you should try another job if you cannot see the benefits of your customers to yours and your familys lifestyles.

If you wish to move up the corporate ladder with a clear conscience the simple way is to start being the person you wish to be. Get educated and knowledgeable about the position you desire and then when the opportunity comes you are ready to take it. Dress the way you would if working in the new position and ask to fill in when that person is on leave.

In 1977 I returned from a three year overseas trip and was told that jobs were hard to get. This was the time of the famous statement by our then Prime Minister, Malcolm Fraser, Life wasnt meant to be easy. I didnt listen to any of this and obtained a job within two weeks.

For nearly a year I worked hard and attended any training courses available to me. Then I noticed that I was performing double the workload of my associates with no extra reward. I moved to another organisation within the same industry with another range of machinery to learn.

This firm was far more forward thinking, however there were some personality clashes. I got down to work to build my career while the others played politics. One by one those above me clashed with their superiors. As they left I put myself forward as a possible replacement. Because I had learnt every aspect of my own area I was able to fill these positions and use my creative mind to make useful changes.

Within two years I had risen to National Service Manager, set up a printed circuit board repair operation, and built a service contract business which earned several hundred thousand dollars per year. I had a highly motivated work force who were performing well.

My big break was when the company was taken over by the giant in the printing industry, Seligson & Clare. Because of my innovative track record I was offered a position of Operations Manager with 140 staff. This involved a move to Melbourne where I stayed for four years.

All of this would not have happened if I had not used my creative abilities and also learnt what was necessary to advance to higher levels of management. I dont believe I was lucky, I made my own luck and so can you.

Oprah Winfrey, the famous American talk show host commented that she would never have been given the role in The Color Purple if she hadnt spent years training to be an actor. Opportunity knocks for those who are ready to take it.

John Gaydon quickly rose to the top of his profession. After a successful corporate career, at the age of 36, he quit his job and started teaching others how to be happy. You can red his philosophy and many of his ideas in his book, “Life Mastery - how to achieve it” available at http://www.pems.com.au/lifemastery.html

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Its a salespersons worst nightmare- the phone call that comes in from a disgruntled customer. Not only does it create extra work for you, but it cuts into your valuable selling time. But believe it or not, this is actually a tremendous sales opportunity and a chance for you to become a hero. Heres how to make this situation work for you:

Empathize With the Client

Though it may be difficult to keep a tight lip, just listen and let your customer vent. Listening allows you to determine what the customer is really angry about. Is it the actual problem that is causing his rage or is it how your customer looks to his superiors? Determine what the customer is really asking for and figure out how to deliver the solution. If higher level management needs to be addressed, this creates an opportunity for you to set up a meeting and establish a relationship. If your customers business is being impacted, then you need to take quick action to find a resolution.

Establish a Plan of Action

Escalate the issue within your company and make sure it gets into the right hands within your customer service organization. Explain the urgency of the situation and request that the parties involved give you updates along the way. Schedule meeting times or conference calls throughout the day to give them specific deadlines and keep things moving. If you dont receive the expected updates, call them and push for resolution. Not only does this keep the pressure on, but it allows you to be the liaison for the customer. Be sure to update your customer on the progress at every step of the way.

Move up the Food Chain

Set up a meeting with your customer contact and his superiors. Bring in your own management and use this opportunity to show everyone involved how you are going to take action. Outline the plan for resolution and commit to updating everyone involved as your progress toward resolution- then be sure to follow up and meet your promises.

A meeting like this lets you meet executives and work your way up the organization chart, laying the foundation for future opportunities. Though you are meeting under unfortunate circumstances, once the problem is resolved, you will be remembered for your quick action and excellent customer service.

Offer a Concession

Since you dont want to offer refunds or credits, and even if your customer doesnt expect one, its a good idea to make a peace offering. Once the problem is resolved, offer your customer a free trial of another product. The trial will not only make them happy, but could lead to a future sale.

You could also coordinate a dinner or trip to a ballgame to thank your new executive contacts for their patience and time. Does your company have a users group meeting, trade show or annual conference coming up? Offer up some free passes. Attendance at events like these almost always leads to a sale. Whatever you do, dont just hand them a gift certificate or gift. Be sure to offer a networking event or something that leads to a future sale.

Another way to wrap up and put a problem to bed is to set a meeting with your new executive contacts. Does your company have an executive briefing center? Offer to coordinate an afternoon event and show the executives your entire product line, introduce them to your companys executives and learn more about your companys vision. If your company doesnt offer this kind of service, create your own. Bring an executive briefing to them by scheduling executives from your company to speak and present your full product line. Order a catered lunch, hand out gifts with your company logo and impress the attendees with your professionalism.

Unfortunately many clients have low expectations of sales people. But you can make this work to your advantage by exceeding their expectations, providing excellent customer service and showing them that you follow through on your commitments. Its the best way to build trust and lasting relationship and before you know it, your most disgruntled customer could become your best source of income.

Stephanie Chandler is the author of The Business Startup Checklist and Planning Guide: Seize Your Entrepreneurial Dreams! and the founder of http://www.BusinessInfoGuide.com, a directory of free resources for entrepreneurs. Sign up for the BusinessInfoGuide newsletter to receive hot resources and tips every month.

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Pro-active Strategies

Actively look at implementing some of these proactive strategies

1. Supplying better quality goods or over-servicing
2. Ensuring speedy delivery. If a customer orders today by direct mail, they are always impressed if the goods are there the next day. This sets the tone for the entire organization
3. Offering after sales discounts
4. Realigning product development to customer needs. This could take the form of a pro-active questionnaire that asks the customer what they liked and did not like. And then setting a product development plan from this feedback
5. Access to additional services or goods as a reward for being a good customer
6. Follow up with a simple customer service call - “we care about our customer”
7. Supply a bonus gift with the sale

People Strategies

A set of guidelines should be developed for anyone that comes in contact with a customer. These guidelines should be backed by detailed training. The types of people that typically come in contact with a customer include

1. Receptionist
2. Sales people
3. Technical people
4. Delivery and warehouse people
5. Secretary
6. Telemarketers
7. Accounts

Review what type of customers that you have, the types of issues that these people deal with and look to develop a series of quality guidelines

Systems - Implement and monitor the following systems

1. Customer service systems
2. Customer feedback systems
3. Regular training of staff
4. Automated survey
5. Mystery shopper
6. Employee incentive to reward high customer service
7. Automated CRM and access by all staff

Areas of Performance you should review

1. Product quality
2. Delivery
3. Courtesy
4. Professionalism
5. Product knowledge
6. Complaint resolution
7. Ease of doing business
8. Invoicing/Accounts accuracy
9. Responsiveness to enquiries
10. Stock availability
11. After sales service
12. Service versus expected service

Indicators (lagged)

1. Lost customers (churn rate)
2. Average value sale
3. Referrals
4. Average life time value
5. Product returns
6. Complaints
7. Customer re-order frequency

About Author

Peter Hickey Corprat Coaching - All rights reserved

Winner of the Ernst & Young NSW “Entrepreneur of the Year award in 1999

Bestselling author and designer of a number of multi award winning business tools that are now being used by more than 60,000 companies around the world.

Founder of a software company that was listed as one of BRW’s fastest growing 100 private companies in 2000. Peter successfully built the company from a one man business to a multi-million dollar concern. The company was acquired 10 years after its inception by a multi billion dollar publisher

Visit - http://www.corprat.com for more information on how to become a business coach and for our free Mini MBA program or business planning service.

Visit - http://www.plansforbusiness.com for more free resources and a free business planning software and free “how to sell your business guides.”

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Despite rumors to the contrary, the Web is not dead. More people are using it,
they have faster bandwidth, and in many cases Net-time is taking over TV-
time. It’s no wonder more users are turning to the Net for help, rather than the
telephone. So why not take advantage by offering your customers help online
after the sale? Given that the average customer care call is $33, it’s a great way
to please customers that prefer the Web over a phone queue and save money
too.

Not that you ever want to drive customers away. After all, keeping a good
customer is a whole lot cheaper than acquiring a new one. The idea is to move
the majority of calls to self-help and reserve quality time for those customers
that need to speak to a real person. If you guide certain customers towards
answering questions themselves, make it a good experience, and offer
incentives for usage, self-help will be their first choice.

The type of online support required for each customer and for each problem
may be different, so it’s best to provide a range of self-help options and let
customers choose what works for them. Online support comes in many forms,
but for now we’ll focus on the least expensive FAQs (Frequently Asked
Questions), Enhanced FAQs, discussion boards, and email. It’s better to start
with a few options first, and do them well, rather than trying to do everything
at once. Offering a good help experience to people who use the Web regularly
makes them more likely to turn to the Web for assistance again and again.

1. Determine Your Online Support Strategy
Figure out what’s going to give you the biggest bang for the buck, then add on.
Having a plan will help ensure that each support component works within a
cohesive whole. Generic information can be easily handled with FAQs or
Enhanced FAQs. More complex or customer-specific information requires
advanced technologies. If you don’t have the expertise or time to build the
functionality yourself, look into Web service providers who can create and host
applications for you.

2. Focus and Target
Don’t try to create online support to cover every subject. Consider customer
demographics to determine who will use the service, why they would use it,
what they would need, and what would get them to use it. Customers
ordinarily will use a combination of both online and offline support options, so
build use cases for each target customer segment to gain an understanding of
their behavior and how to improve their overall experience.

3. Tell Customers Where to Go
Make sure links to the help section are clearly communicated at every touch
point, such as on printed material and through IVR systems. Familiarize your
sales and phone reps with the site and its benefits, as in, “Did you know that
we have a website that shows you how to do that?” Offer customers incentives
to encourage first time usage and let them get in the short phone queue if they
try self-help before calling.

4. Make Help Easy to Find at Your Site
If you don’t provide a direct link to help, make it an obvious click away from
your home page and other appropriate pages.

5. Give them Options
Even if a customer visited the site only in search of contact information, there’s
no reason why you can’t try to resolve their problem while they’re there, saving
both of you a phone call. Briefly describe what is offered through self-help,
how it works, and what they can expect. You don’t want customers to waste
their time looking for information that isn’t there.

6. Should I Give Them My Number?
You should always make contact information available, but the extent to which
you delay publishing it will depend on your target customers and your support
strategy. For example, if you can respond to the majority of visitor questions
with generic information and your goal is to maximize self-help use, then
delay, driving visitors to use self-help first. On the other hand, if many of your
customers require custom treatment and you want the opportunity for personal
contact, as with brokerage services, you may want to make phone numbers
readily available.

7. Start with Simple FAQs
Answer the questions customers ask most often. Don’t worry about trying to
answer every possible question. Build your list from customer questions
received via your customer reps, email, and keywords searched at your site.
Organize the information into a standardized format, write clearly, and don’t
try to sell your customers anything. This is not the place and time. You can
always provide navigation links to sales information. If the FAQs are long, add
an easy to use index or search function.

8. Give It to Them Straight
Make sure the information you provide avoids jargon and terms they would
need to search elsewhere to find. Leverage the technologies available with
HTML to provide definitions via rollovers to help customers get the information
they need faster.

9. More than Just the FAQs
Expand on your FAQs by providing images and interactivity. Imagine how
much easier it would be to show pictures detailing a car battery installation or
a bicycle assembly, rather than explaining it with words alone. Involving the
user through interactivity improves learning and results in a more positive
experience, which means they’ll use self-help again.

10. Get Them Talking
Get customers to search and answer questions themselves via a discussion
board. Harvest information from the boards for your FAQs.

11. e-Mail with Caution
Use e-mail, but be sure you have the resources to respond in a timely and
effective manner. If you set up the expectation that it takes too long to get a
response, customers are going to lose confidence in the service and not use it
again. Be careful about using automated email responders as well. If
customers have to wait and still don’t get the specific help they need, the best
you can hope for is frustrated customers. More likely you’ll end up paying for
this lapse in customer service in the form of phone support and lost future
sales.

12. Survey Says
Let customers tell you what they need. It’s the best way to make improvements
to your online customer support. Ask a few simple follow-up questions
through an online survey, but keep it short and simple. Respect your
customers’ time.

###

Publishing Guidelines:
You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of
charge, as long as the bylines are included. A courtesy copy of your publication
would be appreciated.

About the Author:

Robbin Block is President of PictureSez, Inc., which gives companies an easy
way to enrich their websites with picture-based, online customer support.
Whether for how-to instructions or FAQ’s, our browser-based authoring tool
allows you to ’show’ your customers what to do– without any programming.
Visit http://www.picturesez.com or mailto:rblock@picturesez.com.

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I like writing my customer service tales when theyre hot, current, and theyre uppermost in mind.

This is one of those stories.

Yesterday, I was returning from an international trip, starting the second leg of the way home.

Already, I had been in the air about 10 hours, and it took another hour to clear customs and to re-check my bags. This followed conducting a new seminar, in two languages before an exacting audience and I was exhausted.

Still, I had another three hours to go, from Houston to Los Angeles.

I was flying First Class.

The flight crew was incredibly self-important, seeming to party on the eve of Thanksgiving while sending the message that the rest of us were rudely interrupting them.

I tried to hand my suit jacket to the flight attendant to be closeted and she barked, Just a minute!

There was no please attached to that line; just a grumpy, irritated, impatient tone.

Whats interesting about this verbal abuse is it immediately reversed any positive feelings the flight attendant had engendered to that point.

I became reluctant to ask for anything else, even a piddling additional cinnamon roll.

The offending message she used, Just a minute! is called a MAND as in command or demand. Any English teacher will say this phrase has an implied You will wait or You must wait that precedes it.

So, what the flight attendant was saying is You must wait just a minute!

Thats harsh and it makes me and most customers feel defensive because it sounds controlling, superior, and unduly authoritarian.

It makes you wonder, Who is paying whom, here? If I told you just how much I invested for my itinerary youd appreciate why so many airlines have suddenly become profitable.

But that wont last long as folks like me shop for the cheapest seats they can find, because were learning that First Class, ISNT!

Best-selling author of 12 books and more than 1,000 articles, Dr. Gary S. Goodman is considered “The Gold Standard” in sales development, customer service, and telephone effectiveness. Top-rated as a speaker, seminar leader, and consultant, his clients extend across the globe and the organizational spectrum, from the Fortune 1000 to small businesses. He can be reached at: gary@customersatisfaction.com.

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Good service is easy to spot and hard-to-find. Mediocre service
occasionally stands out but only because it’s the cream-of-the-crap.

Last week I had the opportunity to speak at the Lumbermen’s
Merchandising Corp. annual sales meeting in Dallas. The meetings were held at the Dallas Convention Center and the hotel we stayed at was the Hyatt Regency at Reunion.

The first night I had dinner at the Centennial Caf Restaurant on the second floor of the hotel. The food was good and the service, I mean the server, was outstanding.

It was a slow night and Abdul was covering one half of the tables in the restaurant. Here are some of my observations:

1. Abdul was always smiling.

2. He was energetic.

3. He walked fast and with purpose.

4. As soon as I was seated at the table he asked me for my drink order.

5. Two minutes later - it was there.

6. He wrote down my order which included some special diet
requests.

7. It took four minutes for the bread to be served. The meal
was delivered exactly how I ordered it.

8. When it was time, the plates were removed quickly and quietly.

9. He was there when you needed him and not when you didn’t.

I went back to the same restaurant the next night. This time however, the place was really hopping. I asked for a table with a light, so I could finish a good novel I was reading.

The hostess put me at a table with lots of light and it was right next to the reception podium, where she greeted all customers. She didn’t move or walk fast.

She pointed to my new server who immediately disappeared into the kitchen. I never did see him for the rest of the evening - let me explain.

Abdul approached the hostess and spotted me. He said, “Welcome back.” I asked if he could be my server and he said it would not be possible since he was limited to his station on the other side of the restaurant.

He asked about my server and I told him he hadn’t been to my table yet. Without any hesitation he asked if I would like the same glass of wine I enjoyed the night before. I was impressed and I said yes.

The hostess had her arms wrapped around the podium - what a sight. I managed to get her attention and asked to be moved to Abdul’s section. She gave me her best impression of a positive nod.

Abdul grabbed the menu and escorted me across the restaurant to
another table with enough light for me to finish my book. While the entre was different, the service again, was excellent.

Service can be awesome or dreadful - and it’s usually people who make the difference.

The elements of good service are not instinctive and are usually the result of extensive training. Unfortunately, servers don’t get to judge the service - that’s strictly up to the customers.

The reward for good service is more business. The reward for superior service is even more business. It should also be noted that “Profitability is the applause of a happy customer.” I gave gave Abdul a big tip.

In conclusion and generally speaking . . .

People who walk fast make more money than people who don’t.

People who are enthusiastic, energetic, and show a little passion for their work also make more money than people who don’t.

People who go out of their way to help and serve their customers are always more appreciated and valued.

One of the keys to successful selling is to help your customers get what they want.

Obviously, Abdul has that figured out.

Jim Meisenheimer’s business is your business. His sales techniques and selling skills focus on practical ideas
that get immediate results. You can discover all his secrets by contacting him at (800) 266-1268, e-mail:

jim@meisenheimer.com or by visiting his website: http://www.meisenheimer.com

You can also check out his NEW online Sales Effectiveness 360 Assessment at this website: http://www.no-brainersalesprofiles.com

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Lets face it, good customer service can make or break a company. Even if the product is top-notch, if the sales representatives dont have great customer service skills, it doesnt matter. Customer service should be a number one priority to any business.

But how do you train sales staff to be good at customer service? Customer service involves many things. It requires a great attitude, a knowledge of the business, and a real desire to help the customer get what they want, and provide it in a manner that is positive so that they come back and refer their friends and family to the business, as well.

There are a wide variety of customer service training tools available. The key is to find out which type of training best fits your needs. One type of training tool that is good for many kinds of businesses is using video training. Video training is very cost effective. Video training involves a one time cost for the training videos and other materials. Video training is available in a variety of medias, including VHS, DVD and CD-ROM. This makes it user friendly and will work with whatever system you currently have.

Video training can be done with a group or sent home with an employee for some self-study at home. The videos give concrete learning skills and display scenarios to help employees identify what type of customer service skills are needed in any situation. These types of training videos often include simple tips for improving customer service, activities for team building and confidence, and role-playing ideas so that employees can practice the skills they just viewed. It can also provide motivational tips to keep employees enthusiastic about customer service.

Another advantage of video training is that you can train employees now, and other employees in the future. If you feel like your employees need a refresher course on some aspect of good customer service, you can show it immediately, without waiting to book a trainer. These are the kind of tools that work anytime, anywhere, which saves time and money for the business owner.

Finding a company that sells these kinds of customer service training tools is as easy as connecting to the Internet. There are a ton of companies that offer video training. Many will allow you to view the videos before purchase so that you can decide which format would be best suited for your business and employees. The videos are reasonably priced to fit within any budget, and often you can purchase just one or two videos or an entire training course. Its up to you. Now, teaching your employees how to provide excellent customer service has just gotten a lot easier.

Bob Hett offers great tips and advice regarding all aspects of
training tools and videos. Get the information you are seeking now by visiting http://www.trainingvideoscenter.info

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When was the last time you had really great customer
service? Perhaps it was when you bought something in a
store, checked in at a hotel or the airport or even made an
enquiry over the phone.

When I ask this question of participants on my seminars,
people respond with all sorts of great customer service
stories.

They say things like - “The lady I dealt with was
really warm and friendly” or “The guy in the store made me
feel really important” or “They always remember my name when
I go back to that shop.”
What al these comments have in common is that - they’re all
Human Level responses.

We tend to base our judgement of great customer service on
how we’re treated as humans.
Very rarely do I hear - “The goods were delivered on time”
or “They replaced my faulty items without a quibble.” We
tend take these Business Level responses as a given. It’s
the Human Level responses that influence us in terms of
whether we’ll use the service again and/or recommend it to
others.

When dealing with other people be they Internal or External
customers, it’s important to open the conversation on a
Human Level before doing the business; then say something
during the interaction that is not about the business at
hand. Then, when the business is complete, close the
conversation on a Human Level. This is even more important
when dealing with a customer who is upset.

It’s just as important to deal with our Internal customers
on a Human Level before discussing business. Start thinking
about making your emails a bit more Human.

People nowadays will tell you that there’s no time for Human
Level responses and customers, both Internal and External,
want you to cut straight to the business. However a short
Human Level response can speed up the business and make your
life so much easier.

So there you have it; human beings have a massive need for
acknowledgement. We want to know that other people care
about us, that we’re important and we’re accepted. If we
satisfy that need in others by communicating on a Human
Level as well as a Business Level, then all our interactions
will be much more productive.

Alan Fairweather - The Motivation Doctor - is a professional
speaker, author and business development expert.
To receive your free newsletter and free ebooks, visit:
http://www.themotivationdoctor.com

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Much of our communication is unconscious. We dont actively decide what quantity of eye contact we should use or consider the impact of our words on other people and the consequences.

When you watch someones facial expression change or sense a shift in mood it becomes obvious that there has been a deep reaction to the communication stimuli.

The study of such responses is called Transactional Analysis, developed by Dr. Eric Berne, an American psychiatrist in the 1950s.

Transactional Analysis:

Is an analytical thinking process

Provides insight

Gives control over actions and reactions

Knowing the basics about Transactional Analysis will give you a better understanding of why people communicate in a certain way. For example, why they feel the need to be aggressive or manipulative to get their point across when they are unhappy about something.

A child who has had to shout to make his parents listen to him will often take this communication pattern into adult life. He will shout at you because he is conditioned to think you wont listen either.

It will also help you choose a more appropriate style of communication with which to respond.

Ego States:

Berne became aware that within each individual there exists three personalities or ego states which have their own ways of communicating and behaving. He also discovered that we shift from one state to another subconsciously. These states are not roles but psychological realities which are activated by feelings.

He identified them as Parent, Adult and Child ego states. This is why transactional Analysis is sometimes called PAC communication.

These personalities develop in the first few years of life and will be shaped according to background, experiences and upbringing.

Parent
Imagine a tape recorder being switched on at birth and all thoughts, feelings, events and behaviours recorded in an unedited version.

The Parent ego state develops by recording all the rules and laws of the household, characterised by No, Dont, frowning, finger wagging, routines, attitudes, value laden standards, prejudices, criticisms.

There is also another side to the Parent: the nurturing, caring, gentle controlling side.

In later life memories of these behaviours are triggered and parent responses copied.

Think of all the behaviours, body language, facial expressions, attitudes you have taken from your parent (substitute). Has anyone said, Youre just like your mother or Like father, like son?

Child:

At the same time another recording is being made which is the internalising of the response to the Parent behaviours (how the Child feels about them). Cross looks, sharp words, a smack, neglect, sarcasm, can only be recorded as feelings in the child.

Negative Parent Behaviours = Negative Response = Low Self Esteem.

Soon the child either learns to seek parent approval, giving up pleasurable exploration of the world and becoming the Adapted Child, or rebels. The child also stores much positive data: fun times, discovery, creativity, and carefree activity, e.g. puddle jumping. Think of behaviours you still use from your childhood when bad feelings are triggered; door slamming, sulking, temper tantrums, not speaking. Our child state can take over inappropriately if we let it. Think about the complainers you have dealt with recently. Have you noticed similar behaviours?

Adult
Once a child learns to move about he or she acquires some independence and control. He/she finds out things independently and collects data and learns to work out his/her own understanding of life. This is the Adult ego state beginning to form.

The Adult is described as a data-processing computer which makes decisions based on logic and factual information and is not influenced by feelings. It analyses the data in the Parent and accepts it or rejects it, and considers the feelings stirred in the Child for appropriateness. It carries out probability estimating, e.g. in a complaint situation How likely is it that I am going to get this sorted out?.

It can also devise solutions, develop contingency plans and accept the inevitable with equanimity

Parent Complainer

How are these ego states activated when people are dissatisfied customers?

Customers who complain from their Parent draw on criticism, challenging attitudes and an authoritative position (from their personal database). They will use a range of verbal, vocal and non-verbal behaviours.

Their non-verbal and verbal indicators will be:

Head shaking, arms folded, tongue clicking

I paid good money for this

Its a disgrace

Im going to report you to

They approach the situation from a position of How dare they

Child Complainer;

The Child is activated when strong feelings of being ignored, cheated or controlled are triggered. In this ego state we often feel either powerless or rebellious.

Many of the clues to show someone is operating from their Child include: temper tantrums, sulking, nail-biting, no eye contact, nervous laughter, throat clearing.

Indicators will be:

Its not fair

Why should I?

Im not moving from here until I get a replacement

Adult Complainer;

The Adult will be activated once the attitudes and feelings of the Parent and Child have been analysed for their usefulness and put aside.

It will ask questions, make comparisons, stay objective, not be opinionated, and seek out the facts. It does not send subliminal messages, has no hidden agenda and does not play mind games.

The customer who complains from the Adult will acknowledge feelings of anger but has not allowed them to take over. He/she wants a practical solution to the problem and not to indulge in psychological warfare in order to feel better (i.e. a replay of a childhood battle)

Ego States Summary:

When you are in your Parent ego state you use words, behaviours and actions of your parent (substitute). - we all carry our Parent inside:

When your Child is showing you are replaying behaviours and reactions you would have used as a small child. - our Child can always be activated under certain conditions

Operating from your Adult means you have made an objective, logical, autonomous appraisal of the situation. - we are all capable of objectivity

We dont have to be the victims of our childhood behaviour patterns. We have a choice. In business communication we can only safely operate from our Adult.

Copyright 2007 Jonathan Farrington. All rights reserved

Jonathan Farrington is the Managing Partner of The jfa Group. To find out more about the author, subscribe to his newsletter for dedicated business professionals or read his weekly blog, visit: http://www.jonathanfarrington.com

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